Get the best version of you by tapping into the different versions of you!

If you are a self-proclaimed over-achiever, teacher’s pet, perfectionist, you name it - you know what it’s like to beat yourself up when you aren’t feeling your best.  I, personally, have always been extremely hard on myself when I’m not feeling my best or simply don’t have the mental capacity to put 100% in.  What I’m about to tell you will change everything: You don’t have to be on top of the world all the time.  In fact, you rarely will be at your “peak” performance continually, day after day.  What I’ve learned over the years is that it’s consistency which creates success, not “giving your all” day after day.  It’s just not sustainable, and you’ll burn out. 

It’s like going on a diet.  If you sign up to do a full plant based, no dairy, no carbs, lettuce-only diet, it might go well for 3 days.  You might feel awesome & energized.  After a few days though, a burger begins to sound pretty good.  And eventually, you give in.  Then, you beat yourself up and think you’re a failure and the worst dieter on the planet and will never lose those 5 pounds- you know the drill.  You go round and round until you give up on dieting forever, the end.  Business is really similar.  However, they key to making progress is by doing a little bit regularly.  My favorite part about setting small, attainable habits is that I can do them even when I am feeling down on the dumps or just plain exhausted.  For example, if you set a goal to write 10 pages per day, read 10 pages of a book per day, do 25 sit ups, brush your teeth - these are all pretty attainable goals.  But if you plan to run 3 miles every morning, that might not go so well for you.  By setting very regular, smaller goals, you increase your odds of doing them even when you aren’t feeling so hot. 

I used to burn out constantly.  I’d run 100 mph every Monday through Friday - a little bit on weekends & do it all over again.  Then, I’d hit a wall.  This wall would show up on a Monday morning right before I’d be about to head out the door and take on the world.  I’d find myself sitting on the couch in my office, completely blank with nothing left to give.  The gas tank was empty.  What resulted wasn’t necessarily awful performance, but me proceeding to beat myself up about this the entire day.  I was ruthless.  I spent more time being frustrated with myself than actually working or doing anything about it.  It was painful, exhausting, and truly cruel.  I’d end the day feeling worse about myself and even though I may have accomplished something, I gave myself no credit and continued to tell myself how lazy and unproductive I was.  I spent years in this hamster wheel. 

It wasn’t until I hired my first coach and began to learn that giving myself grace was not a sign of weakness.  In fact, it became a sign of strength for me.  I had seen so many people over the years use “laziness excuses” such as “I slept through my alarm” or “I lost my phone” or “I went to jail last night” (I worked in the restaurant industry) - I began to see rest as laziness, and this developed into a really unhealthy view of taking a break or not being 100% “on.”  My coach eventually asked me “Do you think you are a lazy person?”  “Well, no.” I responded.  “Then what are you worried about?”  Honestly, my fears came from worrying others would view me as lazy or that I would magically morph into a lazy, unemployed, blob who couldn’t find a job.  As silly as it sounds, this was my reality, and these were my fears.  I am here to tell you that giving yourself a break is not lazy, it is responsible.  Once I discovered this for myself, things began to change and I knew I was not lazy, and on those days where I felt less “on” - I chose to focus on something else that I could work on.  

Here is something you can do to help: Write down your regular tasks/responsibilities/meetings & put them in buckets.  My buckets for example are “On 100%” (this is when I’m talking, leading, speaking - I am ON. FIRE).  “Introspective” (this is when I’m more interested in reading, writing, curled up on my couch or zoning into my laptop).  “Clerical” (this is when I am down & dirty into some spreadsheets, analytical, reviewing PNL’s, coming up with new ideas, etc).  For me, understanding that it almost takes a different Morgan to do each of these allows me to let her be her depending on how I feel each day.  (Ladies, tracking your cycle can also help you identify when you feel these different ways as well - there is a true science to it).  This practice and understanding gave me so much relief when I realized that different versions of me are good at different things, but they are all equally necessary for my success.  So, the next time you’re feeling a little exhausted, less motivated, foggy, or just plan “off” - give yourself some grace and recognize that is not always you, but that that part of you can be productive as well, in a different way.